Which author wrote these lines about a lover’s vagina?

[It] did not feel like Phyllis’s. Smoother, somehow simpler, its wetness less thick, less of a sauce, more of a glaze . . .

Yes, it was John Updike; he is in the running for the 2008 Literary Review Bad Sex in Fiction award.

I think this is overdue. He should have won in 1994 for his novel Brazil.

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